NOSOTROS

We have lived so much, maybe two full life’s already but we have only been together for 4 years.
I have changed so much, maybe way too much but I have not recollection of any of the changes. 
You have been here and there, and maybe in too many ways everywhere but yet you haven’t fully been here for me. 

I was had a dream. 
I dreamt of true love, I dreamt of pure connection, I  dreamt of a child and a dad , I dreamt of us , and white dress and six bare feet walking no longer alone. I dreamt of you.
But that “you” was only a dream, an invention, a vision and a desperate wishing. Only a hope. 
A hope that kept me waiting for things to change but things don’t change, we do. 
And we have changed. 
My love came, it wasn’t true 
My connection found its other end, it wasn’t pure 
My child was born, my man became a dad 
We created us, you are sleeping next to me 
But my hope is surrendering
There is not white, we three are walking alongside but hearts feel six feet apart. 
There is a beat, there is still a pulse, but the clock does not stop. 
The dream of love can turn habit.
The dream of white can turn gray.
The dream of you can turn away. 
The dream of us can turn nostalgia. 
The six feet will be four soon enough. 
The little ones we hold today will get wings and flew away tomorrow. 
Then I wonder, would we still be us?